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Sunday, March 31, 2013

Sunday Miscellany

Miscellany. What on earth is miscellany?


[mis-uh-ley-nee; British mi-sel-uh-nee]
noun, plural mis·cel·la·nies.
a miscellaneous collection or group of various or somewhat unrelated items.
a miscellaneous collection of literary compositions or pieces by several authors, dealing with various topics, assembled in a volume or book.
miscellanies, a miscellaneous collection of articles or entries, as in a book.
 It's basically a free association trip across my brain!  How exciting!  Let's get started, shall we?

I'm really pissed off at Google.  Instead of doing something fun or respectful for Easter they chose to celebrate the birthday of socialist Cesar Chavez.  DIAF Google creative team.  Die horribly.

I'm in the mood to knit, garden and read all at the same time and I am having a hard time prioritizing. So, I take my Kindle with me everywhere.  I'm still trying to figure out knitting and digging, but if anyone can do it, it is I.

Last week I was asked to describe my idea of heaven.  I left the interrogator gobsmacked.  I'm pretty sure his idea was no where near mine.  And, I'm certain that God DOES want me to have my own pride of lionesses to hunt down and shred liberals.  Obviously I don't operate under the "Streets of Gold" doctrine.

I've stopped engaging passive-aggresive liberal morons and useful idiots.  They always start with, "So, you're a Conservative..." which leads me to respond, "No.  I'm not."  And then the pause, you have to learn to ride the pause because this is off their "talking point" card and they don't know how to react.  But do stare at them pointedly, because they will always (to a freakin' man) ask, "Well, then, what are you?"  To which I reply, "I'm a human being who wants to live."  Again, be patient, ride the pause where they mentally search for the meaning of what you've just said, try to parse whether or not they are allowed to understand that and they will inevitably stutter, "I don't know what that is."  To which I always reply, "I know." and I leave it at that.  Howard Roark taught me that and it's an excellent lesson for your lessers.

Yes, Freddy. There is a right sort and a wrong sort. (Bonus points if you know where that came from.)

Do you ever watch costume dramas and wonder how freakin' hot everybody was, wearing all those clothes?  I see a pioneer film and I immediately begin to sweat and dehydrate.  Sleeves all the time?  A pelisse?  WTF is a pelisse and what is with all the haberdashery?  No wonder they were always fighting wars, the bullets provided some sort of venting.

I'm so sick of the question, "What is your mutant super power?"  Obviously it's sarcasm.  Deal with it.

If Bill Gates and Microsloth are the Unholy Empire and Apple is a capitalist pig company why don't all of you Entitlement whiners learn to use Linux?  What?  Line command got your tongue?  Shut it hipster kiddie.

Why are people so impressed by people who can speak more than one language?  I speak two with fluency and another two not so fluently, then bumble about in about 5 more.  I don't presume everyone speaks English.

Why is it my cat wants in from the sun room, then immediately wants to return to the sun room, but only during the times we shut the door?  If the door is open she won't go near the sun room.  And then she just stands in the doorway doing that cat stare thing.  It's like she's Schroedinger's Cat and Maxwell's Daemon all at the same time. If you have no knowledge of cats, particle physics or thermodynamics, leave this one alone.

Why aren't more people knowledgeable about particle physics and thermodynamics?  Hell, they don't even know there is a concept called hydrodynamics.

Why is math so scary to people when they are young and so interesting when you get older?

Interesting fact, the keepers of one of my favorite knitting sites are named Sheldon and Amy.  Took me years to "get it".

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