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Friday, April 09, 2010

Friday Free Association

I'm pretty lucky. I don't get many comments on my blog or any e-mail. Most of the comments I receive are in my face based on something I've said that everyone around me was thinking but no one would say. I never remember exactly what people say because it all distills down to a shrill, "You're a mean, hating meanie who wants to starve the baby seals in Africa!" To which I generally reply, fist in the air, "Nuke the unborn gay whales!"

Yeah, I'm really mature that way.

I could defend myself and point out how wanting the best for myself is in the best interest of everyone around me as they benefit from it as well as I do from them getting the best for them. However, the microencephalics who surround me here in Stepford, could never ever grasp that concept because they have already embraced sacrifice as a virtue. Much worse, they are allowed to teach it to their children.

Let me impart a happening from my past that illustrates the above perfectly.

When my boys were young and my oldest daughter still a twinkle in my eye, I took them to the local playground to ride on the merry-go-round and swing for a bit. There were some other mothers there that day with the same idea, get out of the damned house for a bit. All three swings were occupied and my oldest boy was enjoying himself on one of them when one of the mothers said that her son wanted to swing. I muttered that one should become vacant soon. Her friend turned to me and said, Your son has been on there for five minutes, he should give up his swing to one of the other kids."

Now, my son was 3 years old. It was a year after a very scary accident and I will still loathe to even let him play with other children, so taking him to the park was a big deal to me. I told her that my son was enjoying this time outside and I would not make him end his joy so some other kid could swing. The other kid would just have to find his joy elsewhere. Then I added the poisonous, "To ask my son to give up his happiness so your son can have some is obscene. I cannot believe you were allowed to breed."

Yes, I said it. I voiced what we all think when we are asked to sacrifice our happiness so someone else can be happy. Why should a child give up his toy to give it to another child who has none?

So let me explain the lie of altruism. Sacrifice does NOT make you happy. It only makes the person taking it from you happy. Never, ever listen to anyone who tells you that you MUST sacrifice your happiness for theirs. Run away and never speak to them again.

Before you get your panties in a twist and start crying that I'm a hating hater racist with demonic leanings, let me explain that I do give charitably. However there is the proviso, it has to be something that gives me happiness doing it. I teach religious education at my church. Why? I'm not paid for it, but I enjoy it so much and love to watch the kids learning something I consider important. It gives me joy and in turn, it makes a very boring hour into something a tad more palatable. I give clothes to the local shop for people in need. I need the space in my closets, they need clothes on their back, win/win. I make afghans for the local VA hospital. I like to knit, they like to be warm and know someone in the world is thinking about them, again, win/win. I give money to organizations I know for a fact will spread education and the message I believe in. It enables them to print more pamphlets, put more video and audio tracks up on their website, and perhaps puts something towards a scholarship for a student striving to get through school.

I do not donate to political campaigns or even put signs in my yard. Politicians are all lying sacks of shit who would gleefully sell their soul for a promise. Hello, Bart Stupak.

Do what gives you joy. As long as it harms no one else or steals their happiness, then it's good. If what gives you joy gives joy to others as well, BONUS!

But never, ever as anyone to give up their happiness so that you can be happy. We'll get more in to that soon. As I explain how earning a paycheck and doing things you don't exactly enjoy or fulfill you bring you a paycheck, which DOES bring you happiness. Oh, wait, I just did.

Have a great weekend. Enjoy yourself and don't feel guilty for a moment. Enjoy your moment. You've earned it.

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