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Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Christmas Musings

Another Merry Christmas to you folks out there.  It's been another fantastic year.  My daughter's wedding ate up most of it.  It was lovely, but we're all thankful it's over.  They are a lovely couple.

I look back over the past year and frankly I am amazed that we all made it, but I think our Founding Fathers knew something we didn't.  Americans are exceptional and once that cat was out of the bag, you couldn't put it back in.  It will eventually beat Statism and Socialism, but this fight is far from over.  I'm a scrapper and look forward to kicking some commie ass.

I've not felt the Christmas spirit this year.  Just too much going on and too much utter hatred fro where I spend most of my day.  That ends January 1, though, and I'm the happiest of campers about that.  I count down the days and hours like a madwoman.  I'd really prefer not to hate my fellow man as much as I do because of the people I'm around all day.  The only saving grace has been the folks immediately around me.  A better bunch of ladies you could never meet in one place.  I'll never forget any of them.  They are the ones who have kept me from completely going off on people who wouldn't understand why I'm so mad anyway.

I adore my friends, and you know who you are.  They enrich my life to such a degree and I don't think they are even aware that they do it.  I don't think they are aware of how much I truly love and enjoy them.  Some day I hope to return to them the joy they have given me throughout the years.

My children are an even greater joy, even though most days they drive me to the gin bottle.  They are grown, living their own lives, having their own problems that they tell me nothing about. I love them beyond the bounds of reason and would move heaven and earth for them.  I want them to be happy, but only they can do that for themselves, so most of all, I want them to want to be happy. Then I want grandkids, but their parents need to be happy first so they can appreciate that when your kids are hateful, it's not about you and it's not personal.

The one person who brings me the most joy on this earth is my husband.  Mark brings to me a quiet contentment that has everything to do with trust and respect.  He will move heaven and earth to make me happy.  He also does small things, like remembering that I forgot to put cranberry sauce on the shopping list, that make me love him even more.  He's the absent minded professor that can drive me to anger so fast when he gets lost in his own head.  He's the computer networking genius that utterly confounds me every time he opens his mouth, but then shocks me into utter awe when he quickly and fluently understands a difficult scientific theory and can begin to tease things out.  Mark is the guy who gets me birthday gifts twice a year, which I will accept.  He's the guy who forgot our first anniversary (Doug and Diane never will, I can assure you of that).  He's also the guy who stood with me when we lost our son and took on everything I carried when I couldn't cope for months afterward.  He's the guy who decided to show me that owing a bank over $100K was not necessarily a bad thing.  (It's still scary as hell, but I no longer hyperventilate).  He bravely withstood my wrath at talking about money, budgeting and getting finances in order.  He's the most stubborn Dutchman I know (and I've met many from his family) and is willing to go toe to toe with me rather than back down when he thinks he's right.  I will say this, there are not many people who are willing to do that with me face to face.  (Online is completely different).  He's the man who has kept all but one promise he's made to me.  But I will get the piano and the cat named Piano.  Hide and watch if I don't.

I am thankful for me.  I love me because I know that I am exactly who I am.  I'm thankful that I was willing to do the hard, unpopular things when everyone else was skating.  Stupid, hard, Martha Stewart, unnecessarily difficult things are retarded.  I have done the right thing for the right reasons most of the time.  Yeah, sometimes I can be petty and utterly hateful, especially when I'm PMSing.  But I try to approach even that with reason and logic and bury those pesky emotions with chocolate and potato chips.

To everyone I know, Merry Christmas, and may your New Year be full of happiness and joy.  Live Rationally!

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